Once, long ago, I tried making new year resolutions and it always fell through. Over time, I found the perfect plan for me; make large goals and planning everyday as it comes while keeping faith that my lord will sort me out at the end of the day. The aesthetic girlies will call it manifesting. While writing my year end review for 2023, I decided to be more serious with my journaling and it gives me great joy to announce (with evidence of course) that I did it. I had a review for every month of the year. I honestly didn’t think I could make it but I am so proud of myself. So here’s to me and disappointing the pessimist in me 🥂.

In January, I planned to handle my finances better, read more books and take up a new hobby. I was able to finally put most of my random spending habits in check but I read less books than last year. I really don’t know why because I started out really well but towards the third quarter, I had slowed down to a crawl. I will list the books at the end as always because that’s when I’ll actually go over to my highlights and count them. I couldn’t have known then but looking back, it started in January, the sudden flashes of nostalgia and longing.

By February, I was already second guessing my monthly review commitment. It was like my mind was trying to prove me right that I would not be able to keep up with it. I wrote next to nothing in my journal and was just floating about carrying the random weight of something I could not name or even put a finger on. It didn’t help that I had a day that I would forever call one of the worst days of 2024. Every hour of that day was either annoying, scary or confusing.

March though hot was quite peaceful, it came with a few career disappointments but I suddenly developed a hyper fixation of adding a book review section to the site and I did it wayyy faster than I projected. It was Ramadan and that made it easier for me to plan out my day to the last hour and it went splendidly. It was also during this time that I decided to take my masters project a little bit more seriously and actually started thinking of directions and topics to work with. I'm in a good place right now but it’s not the right place. At the moment I’m forced to enter a realm of development I honestly didn’t think I would venture into anytime soon and that’s making me lag but at least we are at the development phase, so that’s something.

The sudden reality of adulting stuck me in April. Though instead of making me think about the future or where I am at the moment. I took walks on the childhood lanes buried in my head, with streets I don’t remember well, lined with plants and nature in shades of red, yellow and everything in between, dusted with faces I will never get to see again in this lifetime. Maybe the reason I love sunsets so much is because of those reds and yellows. By the end of the year I had come to the conclusion that there’s a personality I’ve copied and I’m trying to keep alive that only a few people know about. April was sad but not in the tears type of way; it was in the “close my eyes and watch a playback that's basically just lots of pictures stitched together” type of way. If you want to be befuddled, learn from April; always teetering between hot and cold, dead and alive.

Looking back, it’s quite funny how my months seem to flip between positive and negative because May was my favorite month of 2024. I was not calm or filled to the brim with excitement (which can be overrated if I’m being honest), it was just a month I looked more at myself. I had a weekend sleepover with friends and spent lots of time alone. I spoke to myself more (in a non-mental illness type of way 👀) and tried to think of nothing. I got two new baby cousins too and another dessert was added. I even tried an exercise routine but did it last? I think we all know the answer to that 🫠.

June marked the beginning of summer rains and grey clouds, my favorite time of the year. I’ve always loved it when it rains. If you can manage to annoy me while it’s raining, you must be very skilled. I rested and slept loads and enjoyed not socializing. Though by this point I was quickly realizing my reading was taking a backburner and my thesis too. I tried my best to pick up my knitting habit and failed and that’s now next year’s problem.

In July, I travelled. I would like to claim that I went out and had fun but I spent 14 days in another city and went out only three times, but in July, I rested. I slept, napped and slept again. I did nothing but be an aunt to my favorite humans. I even did a unique thing on threads for just the month of july. I read the worst book ever and found myself hoping and praying for the main character of the book to die. I was reading a book from the POV of a pick-me girl and I was tempted multiple times to just go on tiktok and leave horrible reviews about the book. I honestly think these three books ruined my whole reading vibe for the year. Yes, I would like to blame the “shadow and bone” series for putting me in a reading slump.

Sometimes you blink and stumble into weird quirks. Like how I started randomly thinking of specific types of books I like and favorite numbers in August. I won’t go into details about it because my August would frankly register as boring for an observer. It was melancholic and greyer than I thought it would be and reading a horrible book series didn’t make it better. I had a short fuse during this time and I still don’t know why. I’m still gonna blame Alina 😒.

September has a way of being the shortest month of the year. This year it was solemn and quiet with sprinkles of happy days and experiences. I travelled again but this time for work and chores which isn’t much fun but I got to see the desserts and that made it worthwhile. The theme of August followed me here too but it decided to bring in external catalysts. I will remember 30th September, 2024 as the worst day of the year while patting myself on the back for the very adult habit of managing my emotions. On a positive note though, I cloud gazed and it brought back memories from a decade ago. Anger is usually followed by silence and that’s exactly what October was. I can’t even write a summary because nothing happened. The only significant change was that I acknowledged I have a problem with drinking water. I finally had to admit it after I went a whole day without taking up tp 20 cl of water. I now take at least 1 liter and I think I've made my friend proud.

And so the year comes full circle with November and its own wave of Nostalgia. The harmattan season has settled in and with it came a burst of yellow and my favorite flower of the season. A wild flower that almost seemed like a wish when I was a kid because I would always see them but could never touch them. I actually wish to one day (public be damned) pick a bunch of it, put it in a vase and just sit with it for a while. On the more career/ productive side of things, I worked on a friend’s open source project and got in touch with a forgotten language. Also, If you’re reading this and wondering why I said the year comes full circle in November is because December is basically a social event month.

Truely, December was socially packed, I had something going on every week from reunion days, to brunch dates and picnics. We had a 10 year anniversary day out with my secondary school friends having brunch and watching movies. I haven’t watched a hollywood movie in a while but this one was great, it’s called “The jackpot”. The next weekend, I had an intimate breakfast date with a friend. The next weekend, I was at a picnic with university friends marking 5 years of graduation. We played games and ate good food. I opted out of my office’s year-end party because I had concluded I had enough socializing and needed to rest for a bit. I also already have a list of weddings for the first third of the year. The desserts surprised their grandma with a visit but of course, I knew 🙃. Being all cozy with my sisters always reminds me of those days we spent together keeping secrets, consoling each other and just being girls. The desserts were great, especially muffin, he seemed to let loose and get much more comfortable during the last days of their stay. Cookie marked his sixth year during their stay and we had cake and lots of sweets. Unfortunately, they had to leave earlier than planned but it was a great week with my babies. After that it was just planning for the next year and being home.

As I was preparing to write this review, I realized I had been failing to pick up and read a book since September, it just sort of kept spilling and it’s now December and I know it will spill over to the next year. I realized though that I enjoy the buzz empathy gives me but sometimes that buzz wants a specific emotion. Right now my brain wants joy and my pending book is a little bit sad. I think that’s why I only read a few pages and then drop it back. Don’t get me wrong, it's a very interesting book. I just wish I picked it up in June when I was ready for that type of emotion. It also doesn’t help that I have other distractions/hobbies.

Ultimately, 2024 was definitely my year of self discovery. I remembered old habits and observed new ones. I tried to make sense of certain personality traits I had and tried my best to change some of my red flags (maybe 😒). I made stronger connections with two friends who I feel are so similar but also very different. Most of all I am very proud of how I was able to keep this 12 summary/review streak and I sincerely hope I can do it again next year. I achieved all my goals, kept most of my promises and had tea with my ghouls.

Now, Here are all the books I read this year, with ratings out of 5 stars

1. Shigidi and the brass head of obalufon - Wole Talabi - 5 stars see review
2. The good Daughter - Karin Slaughter - 3 stars see review
3. Shadow and Bone - Leigh Bardugo - 2 stars see review
4. Siege and Storm - Leigh Bardugo - 2 stars see review
5. Ruin and Rising - Leigh Bardugo - 2.5 stars see review
6. The FlatShare - Beth O'Leary - 3.5 stars see review
7. The Whispering Trees - Abubakar Adam Ibrahim - 4 stars see review
8. LVOE - Atticus - 5 stars see review
9. A Thousand Splendid Suns - Khaleed Hosseini - currently reading

This was less than last year, we'll see how next year goes